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Let's discuss summer alternatives

The cynicism is rising up again and I can't help it.
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The cynicism is rising up again and I can't help it. So let's pander to it and talk about having a negative summer experience instead of all the lollipops and goodness stuff we usually hear from summer vacationers who are just heading out or soon to come home from a summer vacation. You want a summer experience? Well, you can get a summer experience call it the cruel summer experience. Let's start with the Calgary Stampede. You could have set out for that Alberta centre only to be fed some watery pancakes by the prime minister. How's that for getting off on a wrong foot!Then you could wander over to the thrill rides and watch people fly off them and sue the Stampede. Next stop would be the chuckwagon races where you could thrill to the excitement of seeing horses collapse. Tired of the Stampede? Then hike on up to Edmonton and hang out with the national weather forecasters and share a few giggles with them as they fumble their way through trying to predict the next 24-hour weather pattern. Laugh along with them and spin the old Doppler just for the heck of it and see what comes up. You might then swing back into Saskatchewan to set up lawn chairs in either Maple Creek, Yorkton, Saskatoon, North Battleford or Kawacatoose and watch the every day citizens attempt to pump out their basements and kitchens and argue with insurance adjusters. That's always a good hoot. Nothing like climbing on the backs of others' misfortunes to provide some good negative entertainment. Next you could have taken a drive in the countryside to observe all the waterlogged, swamped fields that never got seeded. That would bring an extra big thump to the old heart eh? Then you might have returned to Estevan to arrive just in time to learn that well, we're finally beating Weyburn in something mosquito counts. As one astute reader, Ron Gallaway, pointed out the other day, "we're finally able to beat Weyburn at something, even if it mosquitoes."I hope he doesn't mind my borrowing his quip for another negative dissertation, but what the heck, that community just down the road can drive us to distraction. We can't beat them in football, basketball or hockey and we can't beat them in community cleanliness and we can't beat them in political influences, but darn it all, we've got 'em beat when it comes to mosquitoes! Take that, you nasty old culix tarsalis wanna be. So that's my singular rant this week, dear diary.Just make sure you're not having a negative, cruel summer. Keep it fun. And for a couple of closing comments: Well, here's a note and shout out to Arizona. Hey you guys, once you've legislated evil foreigners like the Canadians and Mexicans off your precious sand box, then whatchya gonna do? Well, at least your impending water shortage problem will be delayed a year or two with the decline in demand. You know me, just thinking out loud here. Final note to Brad Wall. Hey Brad, those billboards are outdated now. We need the new ones put up now, you know, the ones boasting about how we're now Number 8 and we've just added $500 million to the provincial debt. That should bring 'em in eh what? Who says negativity doesn't sell?

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