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Happy Victoria Day, now get back to work

Well, back to work now. I hope everbody enjoyed their Victoria's Secret holiday on Monday. I don't know why they've named this holiday after a wimmin's lacy, racy underwear catalogue, but hey, I'll take a holiday whenever it's handed to me.

Well, back to work now. I hope everbody enjoyed their Victoria's Secret holiday on Monday.

I don't know why they've named this holiday after a wimmin's lacy, racy underwear catalogue, but hey, I'll take a holiday whenever it's handed to me.

This is a specific Canadian holiday too, which makes it kinda special. But I still don't know why they've named it after some female unmentionables. I realize that it's a bit of an uplifting experience, if ya know what I mean, but to have a whole day dedicated to it?

It used to be called Eaton's Day, but they went out of business, (you can look it up) so we get Victoria's Secret Day now instead.

I think it should have a more Canadian flavour though, so I believe next year we should celebrate Hudson Bay Blanket Day, or Canadian Tire Day or Tim Horton's Day or Gordie Howe Day. Anyway, I hope you had a good long weekend, even if it was rainy and windy.

They call it influence peddling and it might be getting out-of-hand.

I mean Rahim Jaffer, meet Sarah Ferguson.

Sarah, the Duchess of York, was caught on tape telling some undercover cops, posing as business agents, that she could get them a meeting with her former husband, Prince Andrew for a half-million British pounds.

That makes the Jaffer's claim to having access to the Canadian prime minister's gang for a price, a small potatoes mug's game.

It's all so foolish, this contact with the higher-ups game. Who wants to meet the prime minister's posse anyway or the guy who's eighth or ninth in line to the British throne? I'm more interested in the person who can hook me up with a good plumber or a person who knows something about hardwood floors.

But if you insist on paying for access to other people, well, hey for $1.50, I can arrange to have you meet pretty well anyone here at The Mercury. It'll be $1.61 if you want to have 10 minutes with Jan Boyle though, cause she's always harder to find around here. Oh ya, and I'll give YOU 11 cents if you'll come in and talk with our sports guru Bradley the Bard Brown. He's lonely, or else he's on location or vacation. I haven't seen him for a few days. Sports reporters have a tendency to work that way, I know I used to be one or I played at being one. Took too many pucks to the head though, so had to move on to regular newsy stuff and I've never been the same fortunately.

Next topic: Who has the strangest comb over in celebrity land now? Is it still Donald Trump or is it Justin Bieber? Just wondering. What do you think?

Hey, my run for Governor General has hit the wall, dear diary. I'm stuck on two votes right now. That puts me 42,998 behind William Shatner and miles behind Rick Hanson. I need that job! If I don't get it, I think they should hand it back to that Jean girl and let her keep doing what GG's do for another five years because she's kinda good at it. And if we have to hand it off to a Canadian celebrity, then that leaves me out, so why not Buffy St. Marie or Shania Twain? I know neither one of them live in Canada right now, but they might come home again with the proper inducements, like that real neat GG's house in Ottawa or Hull or wherever it is, or maybe a recording contract.

OK, I suppose you've received enough random thoughts from this corner of the market to last you for the rest of your week.

Hope the weather is better for our next national holiday, Bricklin Memorial Day on July 1. I know, those of you under the age of 35 probably don't know what a Bricklin was well look it up! I can't be responsible for your entire educational experience, can I?

Contact me at [email protected] night or day, we're at your disposal 24/7 around here. Well, not really, but it looks good on paper.

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