Choosing new paths in life and finding the confidence to stay on them comes down to reprogramming your mind. We often promise to take action – whether it’s working out or improving our productivity – but struggle to follow through. This inner conflict can persist for years, undermining our ability to create lasting change and eroding our confidence.
We aim to overcome procrastination and make real progress, but desire alone is rarely enough to bring about focused, sustained action. When we constantly battle the voice in our head telling us we can’t succeed, we’re nurturing fear. That fear undermines our best intentions and keeps us stuck in place, repeating the same patterns.
In this headspace, productivity becomes almost impossible.
Our brains operate from two different perspectives:
- The Conscious Mind: This is the part of your brain that analyzes, decides, and plans how you want to live or what you want to achieve.
- The Subconscious Mind: This part controls automatic processes and behaviours based on deeply ingrained beliefs.
When the conscious and subconscious minds are in conflict, the subconscious always wins. You might consciously decide to pursue your goals, but if your subconscious programming is filled with doubt – such as “I’m not good enough” or “I’m not ready” – you’ll hesitate. Your subconscious mind is like a silent enforcer, making sure that the deep-seated beliefs you’ve formed over time control your actions.
This is why you might find yourself playing video games or scrolling through social media instead of working on something that will help you move forward.
So, how do you break free from this cycle?
All lasting change must happen at the subconscious mind’s belief level. To behave differently and get lasting results, you must clear out doubt and fear. Simply arguing with yourself or trying to reason away your beliefs isn’t enough.
The first step is to identify the fear behind the avoidance. Ask yourself what you’re truly afraid of in relation to the activity you’re avoiding. For example, are you afraid you might not be chosen if you submit your name for a project? If you break that down further, what’s the real fear? Is it rejection? Disappointment?
Once you acknowledge what you’re afraid of, you’re already halfway to solving the problem.
Next, it’s essential to develop strategies to counter those fears. Here’s a simple method to start:
- Identify the fear that drives the belief. For instance, “If I apply for this project, they might not choose me.”
- Face the reality of that fear. Ask yourself, will rejection be the end of the world? In most cases, the consequences are emotional discomfort, not life-threatening. Recognizing this helps put fear into perspective.
- Develop an antidote to the negative belief. What if you could be okay with the possibility of not being chosen? Start by asking yourself, “What’s the worst that could happen if I don’t get it?” Then, craft a belief that encourages you to act despite the fear. For example, “Not being chosen doesn’t define my value,” or, “This is just one opportunity, and there will be others.”
- Reinforce a new belief. Push the new belief into your subconscious mind by repeating it regularly. Statements like, “I haven’t mastered this skill … yet!” or, “My life is bigger than this one moment,” can create a healthier mindset that encourages action.
Remember, repetition is key. You must frequently repeat these new belief statements to replace outdated ones. When you notice an old, unproductive thought creeping in, imagine yourself updating your mental software. Like with any program, the more you practice, the more the new belief becomes your default setting.
Finally, one important element in overcoming inner conflict is taking small, manageable steps. Getting off the couch starts with micro-actions that build momentum. For example, if your goal is to exercise but you’re stuck in procrastination, commit to five minutes of activity. Once you’ve started, you’ll often find it easier to keep going. Small wins build confidence and signal to your subconscious that you’re capable of change.
By addressing fears, reframing beliefs, and taking small, consistent actions, you can retrain your subconscious and shift from a mindset of avoidance to one of growth. Over time, this new programming will help you stay on the path toward your goals with confidence and resilience.
Faith Wood is a professional speaker, author, and certified professional behaviour analyst. Before her career in speaking and writing, she served in law enforcement, which gave her a unique perspective on human behaviour and motivations. Faith is also known for her work as a , with a focus on thrillers and suspense. Her background in law enforcement and understanding of human behaviour often play a significant role in her writing.
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