WEYBURN - Bullying can happen anywhere, and can happen at any time, especially with the increased use of online messaging. There are many forms of bullying, and it can occur one-on-one or in groups. It can be a traumatic experience to be a victim of bullying, and the effects can last a lifetime, as it can lead to depression, social anxiety, and low self-esteem.
There are some bullying acts that are illegal under the Canadian Criminal Code, but it can be difficult to feel strong enough to report bullying or speak to the authorities about the incident.
Being bullied makes a person feel incredibly insecure, and one might end up feeling on guard for the rest of their life. During my youth, there was a time when bullying classmates would use a shortened form of my name in an insulting manner - I was called Scabby Sabby - and to this day, I hate it when someone calls me Sab or Sabby. The toxicity and trauma of the memory is enough that it is very difficult for me to even write about what happened to me.
It was not easy for me as a teen when we first moved to this community, as I was entering my Grade 8 year at the time. I did not have the established friendships that my other classmates had, and living in Weyburn was an adjustment.
I have always been a very creative minded person, and I was very passionate about drama and creative writing when I was in high school. I loved to embody the roles that I had in plays during high school. One of those was as Hecate in the Scottish Play (for those of you in the theatre world, you will know the folklore behind the performance). As Hecate, my coven of witches were all close friends, and we decided to act in our roles during class time the day of dress rehearsal.
Well, as you can imagine, I must have been very convincing, because for the rest of the year, the rumor was that I believed I was a witch. The bullying and gossip spreads fast in a small town, and it got to the point where students at the junior high school would also tease me whenever I walked by the former WJH on my way to the Comprehensive.
I will admit that there were times when I was a bully myself. After all, when you are young and trying to find yourself, you act out towards the people around you. When I reached university, I was able to find a peer group of people who were just as passionate about drama and creative projects as I was. It was there that I understood more about who I was, and how my life might have been impacted by these memories – but it helped me learn how to overcome obstacles and differences in personalities.
Now that I am a parent, I admit that I was a bit of a momma bear when I learned about my son being targeted by bullies when he was younger. It was a life lesson that he had to learn and overcome, and I made sure there was open communication so he felt safe talking to me. His experiences were so different than my own, as it was more online and virtual bullying that he had to face.
We do not just find bullies in the schools and classrooms, as there can be bullies in the workplace, in social settings, and in relationships. The important thing is to make sure that victims of bullying feel that they have a safe person to turn to. Talk to your neighbour, or a close family member, or even a trusted co-worker. In our community, one can turn to the resources and programs available at Envision Counselling or the Canadian Mental Health Association.