In recent travels, one half mile at a time, the minions of talk radio informed me the world is full of people who think they multitask. The kicker is that they may not multitask at all, rather, different head-computers have different processor abilities. To explain
By whatever tests our illustrious scientists use in their search for knowledge, they were able to determine that while you are attempting to complete several tasks at once much like a computer you have to flip from "window-to-window" to do each task. While automatic functions like breathing are not considered, multiple tasks can be completed, but the physical function is that each task has to be completed separately from any other task. After millions of dollars of research and time and money and discussion and debate and public forum, the discovery has enlightened our souls.
Hmm, I wonder if scientists have ever had children.
While the baby bears of the Monarchy of Mom are well known to be hard working young individuals, I'm sure I could have proven all the above theory in 12 minutes. You set a child in front of one of these infernal devices known as "technology" and shockingly their mental function reduces to one function at a time.
"Baby bears. Go get some firewood and get the supper dishes done," says the Daddy bear.
Baby Bears' response:"Huh ?!?!"
"Go do the chores I just asked you to do."
Baby Bears' response "What ?!?!"
I reach over and flick off the TV, the light goes on.
"Do your chores."
Baby Bears' response, "Okay Dad. We would love to do our chores and prepare for the following day of school! We love you so much, you're the greatest! "
Okay, okay, so maybe I embellished a little bit.
Another great example; A great bellow spreads across the land through an open front door to the baby bears of the forest, "SUPPER TIME!" Another bellow follows in about five minutes and occasionally a third, grrrrrrr. This is not a new experience to anyone who has ever owned a baby bear. When consumed by the world of skiing, fighting, sledding, skating, biking, riding, playing, building, destroying, a baby bear is highly inept at hearing about supper. Especially a supper that contains foliage- the boy and I agree 'green stuff' is what food eats.
Now at the same door, a whisper of ice cream or Momma Bear's fresh baking coming out of the oven, results in a stampede starting some half mile back and a roaring charge not dissimilar to the giant herds of caribou in the north. In a cloud of dust and the rattling of utensils, the little locusts eat everything in sight and all that is left is a lonely bowl slowly rumbling to a stop in the sink. All you have to do is flip open the right window in the head-computer and viola, instant attention to detail.
Science my butt
Now here's the interesting part for me. To lay claim that I am somehow superior in this manner would be hypocritical at best and an outright lie if I choose to be honest about the whole thing. There is only one difference. If you are 16 or older, your TV is probably in your hand, pocket, maybe in a handy little holder, possibly on your desk, your purse, on the chair next to you, in your lap or in a variety of locations all within reaching distance.
My admission, I busted two guards and a sickle because I was "watching TV" instead of paying attention to my driving, albeit at seven miles an hour in a big green vehicle in the middle of a wheat field, but none the less it still counts.
Many will have related to the baby bear's diverted attention and most everyone has probably seen an example. So, with that ladies and gentleman, take a moment and think of you and your damn cell phone and ask yourself, "Should I be 'multi-tasking' here or maybe I should pay attention to this 5,000 pound hunk of metal I'm about to drive into that bicycle?"
Just a little common sense folks.
