As 2021 arrives, the entire world looks ahead with sincere hopes for better things to come. Amid it all, are we still worrying about New Year鈥檚 Resolutions? Roughly 45per centof people make resolutions of one sort or another but only about eight per centare successful in achieving their goals.
Many plans are for self-improvement, most notably weight reduction and fitness. According to the proprietors of gymnasiums and diet centers, we are in constant need of improvement, but it鈥檚 never more urgent than in January. This irritating query into our resolve, coupled with television ads mercilessly attacking our slovenly ways, makes a person feel we had better do something about it鈥攁nd quick.
I suppose this time of year is synonymous with over-indulgence. Advertisers know full well we鈥檝e taken an extra slab of pie or pounded back enough cheesecake to tip a boat. They count on our guilt over past gluttony and our naive faith in their promise of quick and effortless weight loss. They鈥檙e good at it,too!
In January of last year I received a letter from a weight-loss company which addressed me familiarly and expressed sincere regret over my unfortunate weight gain and unsightly muffin-top. It pointed out how friends have noticed my lack of confidence and mentioned how apparent it was my old sparkle was gone, due to this excess poundage.
Thankfully, their company kindly extended its hand of friendship as it assured me those days would be long gone once enrollment took effect and I received my first shipment of 鈥渇at burning pills.鈥� My question is, how did they know? Are there spies among us? Was I secretly filmed hefting an extra-large salted caramel latte to my lips as I rolled out the drive-thru?
Moreover, how can we chocoholics be expected to make responsible choices when so many goodies are promoted during the holidays? Last January, minding my own business, I strolled through a department store on my way to peruse their selection of reduced price mittens. (It made sense at the time, don鈥檛 give me any trouble.) Unexpectedly, a loud speaker announcement cut into my thoughts. If I could have but known, these fateful words would have a severe and negative impact on my immediate future.
鈥淎ll holiday chocolates have been reduced to 70 per cent off.鈥�
Helen鈥檚 newly released books of entertaining anecdotes are available on Amazon as Prairie Wool Books, or contact her through听听Several factors come into play here. One is my well established affection for chocolate and the second is my love of a bargain. Some may use the word cheap as a descriptor, but I prefer to think of myself as thrifty. My daughter often caustically remarks we own nothing if it didn鈥檛 first have either a red tag or a yellow label, but she鈥檚 young and foolish so we can disregard her bitter lament.
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Nonetheless, it was poor judgement indeed which caused me to scurry towards the promised spoils with a gleam in my eye. Telling myself I was purchasing these items to share with deserving loved ones at home, I stuffed my basket and proudly lugged them into the house later that day.
I gained ten pounds before the month was out.
Based on this revealing information, I am hardly one to offer advice concerning New Year鈥檚 resolutions aimed at getting in shape. Perhaps it鈥檚 best to simply wish your health and happiness in the coming year and end on the insightful words of Mark Twain.
鈥淣ow is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.鈥�
