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Predators could be a whole lot worse

Predators (DVD/Blu-Ray) -- Dir. Nimród Antal. Starring Adrien Brody, Alice Braga, Topher Grace. Pernicious persons are pursued by perfect preternatural predators on perilous planet. Prognosis: poor.
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Predators (DVD/Blu-Ray) -- Dir. Nimród Antal. Starring Adrien Brody, Alice Braga, Topher Grace.

Pernicious persons are pursued by perfect preternatural predators on perilous planet. Prognosis: poor.

A sequel in the Predator franchise, this one has a group of soldiers and thugs from around the world wake up near one another in a strange jungle. They soon discover they have been placed there by a group of alien creatures hunting The Most Dangerous Game: honey badgers armed with dynamite.No, that's not right. I'm confusing this movie with another, way better movie that exists only in my imagination. I meant B-list actors, not badgers.

Predators is basically your standard action-horror flick where a ragtag group of survivors is picked off one by one in rough order of darkest to lightest skin color.

It starts off as a pretty good entry into the genre, too. The story begins in the thick of things, and even though we already know who the enemies are going to be, they're kept hidden to let the tension rise. The characters can't simply "get to da choppa" this time because they're on a whole other planet.

But pretty soon, the Predators start getting cocky. They have a habit of turning off their camouflage and ominously lumbering towards their prey, just begging to get blown away by one of the heavily-armed humans. This is considerably less scary.

Maybe it makes sense, though. The Predator in the first movie flew all the way to Earth and spent weeks out in nature, living alongside its prey. The Predators in this movie have their humans shipped across the galaxy and placed in a game preserve. These are the kind of spoiled rich hunters who shoot bears from helicopters.

Some dumb plot developments in the last 30 minutes drop the score further.Rated R for pecks of pickled peppers.3 out of 5

The Six Wives of Henry Lefay (DVD/Blu-Ray) -- Dir. Howard Michael Gould. Starring Elisha Cuthbert, Tim Allen, Eric Christian Olsen.

Mediocre comedy with mediocre dramatic aspirations.

Tim Allen is the title character, a wealthy man who has gone through six marriages and approximately the same number of divorces. News of his supposed death brings his estranged daughter (Elisha Cuthbert) back home to referee the wives as they scrap over his funeral arrangements.

That's pretty much the whole plot, although the film reaches at least snorkeling levels of depth by exploring the effect Tim Allen's narcissistic character has on his daughter's view of relationships.

Stupid, wretched comedies like Date Night tend to have their apologists among a certain segment of the population, but The Six Wives of Henry Lefay is not one of those. It's merely uninteresting and forgettable, and not likely to inspire excitement in much of anyone. It's not even about polygamy, as the title seems to suggest, so if you were holding out for that you can just stop right here.

The script reads much like a play, but not the artsy kind. It's more like one you would see in a small town's annual community theatre production: the kind with a steady string of outrageous middle-aged female characters so that everyone can rave later about how Aunt Yvonne showed off her wild side.It's not funny, and it's not exactly deep, but the movie has a surprisingly respectful treatment of its dysfunctional characters. So that's something.

Elisha Cuthbert is good: one of a few scattered reasons to stay for the whole thing.

Andie MacDowell looks exactly the same as she did in 1993, which is just freaky.Rated PG-13 for sexual content and corpse desecration (not simultaneous).2.5 out of 5

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