      Dear Santa:                                                                                      Â
           I just thought that I should let you know that I’ve been a good boy all through 2016, simply because I haven’t had an opportunity to inflict mayhem on anybody. I’ve been too busy listening to and complying with my little granddaughter Casey’s orders and demands. She reminds me of my drill sergeant from boot camp, and she keeps Grandma and me in line. We’ve been simply too tired to have had an opportunity to get into any trouble at all!
           Air pollution and global warming are big issues the world governments are grappling with these days. The fact that you are living on the North Pole probably means that you are not a big contributor to global warming, but the methane gas emitted by your herd of reindeer could add to the problem. Perhaps consider barring the reindeer from consuming fermented berries and make them feed on low carb gluten-free lichen and moss. That should keep the reindeer going with less methane gas expelled.
           I know you’re getting on in years as well, and good help is very hard to come by, especially in your line of seasonal work. And now the baby boomers have grown older and have acquired all the toys they want, which should lessen your workload somewhat. Grandma and I have everything, well mostly everything, that we would ever need. We have close relationships with all our family members, and they are all very good to us and help us out whenever they can.
      Please keep that in mind when you review their lists.
           Grandma will also write you a letter, with her wishes in it. I don’t think there will be any surprises there, but I’ll let her tell you. I hope you can get my wish right this year. Last year I wished for a fat bank account and a slim body, but you must have gotten that reversed somehow, so please try and get it right this year.
           Yours truly,
           Kaare Askildt
